Guest Column: In My Day, I Could Write a SYMPL Interpreter in My Sleep
Posted on July 2, 2008
Guest Columnist: Robbie the IT Guy — I tell you what. These fucking people I work with. I’m amazed that they even go to the bathroom themselves. These fucking kids don’t know how great they have it. When I got into this business, we didn’t have these pansy ass graphical interfaces to work with. No we had 40 columns of monospaced green text, if we were lucky enough to have a high end CRT. And you know what? We wrote some god damned fucking great code with that.
I could write a fucking spreadsheet app in my sleep. And it would be under 128 bytes, let me tell you. These pansy-ass motherfuckers have no idea what it’s like to have to fit your entire porn collection on a floppy disk. I was downloading tits over a 300 bit per second smart modem from a BBS before these assholes knew how to suckle their own mommy’s teats. Fucking snot-nose punks around me, I tell you.
These assholes get all bitchy too when they run out of Rock Starz and Ballz and Mountain Dew in the fridge. Those pussies wouldn’t even know what to do with themselves if they had to mix Coca Cola and hot coffee, they way we did around the old Deltaur offices back in my day. And we liked it. God damn kids.
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This brought sun shine to my day!